4 Ways to Release Control + Find More Freedom in Your Daily Life

by | Nov 29, 2023 | Writing

Learning to balance discipline and freedom is one of my personal soul goals, made evident throughout my life and plain as day in my astrological chart. My Virgo sun (which is all about grounding and order) squares my Sagittarius moon (it wants freedom and expansion at all costs), creating this inner conflict that I feel deeply. A part of me wants to travel the world, and a part of me just wants my own bed and my routine. Do you feel me?!

This world is all about duality, meaning, to quote Abraham Hicks (which, as you’ll see, I tend to do a lot), every subject is like two opposite ends of a stick. They were referring to lack and abundance, but in general, there’s black and white, light and dark, day and night…and I could go on forever.

I believe we feel best when we’ve integrated these energies, having found acceptance in both extremes and joy in the balance of them. There truly is something to be learned from both because they each hold immeasurable value when it comes to our growth and understanding.

If you’re overly “disciplined,” life becomes about control and perfectionism. And, on the flip side, when you’re only focusing on freedom, sometimes personal responsibility falls by the wayside. In my opinion, neither feels great for long.

While I’m still very much a work in progress (because, hey, life isn’t about getting to the finish line because said finish line doesn’t exist), here are some specific practical takeaways regarding finding balance that I’ve learned along my path:


The “all or nothing” approach doesn’t work for me. I’m very intentional about what I put into (and on) my body, but the energy behind it is freedom. I get to choose. I ask myself things like, What do I choose to eat today? What will feel best in my body? What do I really want to eat now? I’m also a (mindful) flexitarian; nothing is off limits. And because I’ve been conditioned to be more restrictive in this area of my life, I make it a point to allow myself indulgences and mix up my meals. Awareness where you need balance is everything!

Morning routine

I used to do the exact same morning routine until I was blue in the face. Now, I’ve learned that power of really tuning in and mixing things up every so often. This could look like changing up the movement I do, the order of all the things, the meditation style I practice, etc. The key is noticing and really trying to honor your mind and body.


This one’s a tough one for me, but again, it comes down to committing to certain goals while varying my schedule and offerings. I love Julia Cameron’s advice to go on a weekly date (it can be anything that sparks joy and desire!), where you do nothing but refuel creatively.

Home life/family

The more I grow up, the more I understand my needs — and that is key to finding a semblance of balance at home. For example, I have a weekend morning routine that I’m committed to, and when I’m with my kids, I focus on BEING with my kids. We always have a plan, but it’s a flexible plan, depending on how everyone is feeling — me included!

Releasing control is a very important part of our spiritual journey. Surrendering into the oneness, and trusting that we will be taken care of, is vital if we want to feel the freedom of our true spiritual nature. And I’m pretty sure that’s why you and I are here!

You (and I) certainly don’t need to have it all figured out overnight (ha!). Having awareness around control is a HUGE step toward change.